Month: March 2007

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Georgette drives me to fat camp.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 24:39 — 11.6MB)

bleeple pants
cunt cunt cunt

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:43:00 — 47.4MB)

lapsing on the moon with spacemens

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:31 — 42.0MB)

Eggs with no shells.

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Podshow Plus Beta: Better. Faster. Stronger.

Podcasting that is so killer, it eats your mom out!

Visit GoDaddy.com– be creative and buy lots of domain names!
Use my codes to save:
Madge1 to save 10%
Madge2 to save $5 on a $30 or more purchase
Madge3 to get a $6.95 domain name (dotcoms only)

Shownotes by Matt Blender.

Trotsky barks at Gussy’s ghost.

I lost 7.2 in two weeks and 16.6 lbs. total!

I OD on Mrs. Bailey clips.

There’s going to be a benefit for Josh Wolf.

Michael Butler of the Rock N Roll Geek Show socializes by going to peep shows and masturbating.

I’m cleaning and taking the Wellbutrin.

A vagina is six inches deep, on average.

Trannywreck.

I don’t give a fuck who’s online.

Check out the new Mean Kids blog.

Cheney has a fatal blood clot.

I feel like I have a brain death now.

I really like a blog called China View.

I get to try the Greek yogurt I made yesterday.

I operate in the morning and in the late evening.

I work 10-12 hours, on average.

I don’t like secrets.

I’m mean.

I don’t have anything to say.

China is really killing people on demand to sell their organs.

Yogurt cures vaginal yeast.

I’m a hypocrite and it sucks.

The Olympics shouldn’t be in China.

China blocks Livejournal now.

General Wesley Clark has a penisy video blog.

Stop Iran War

Podshow Plus Beta will host your content for free and anyone can access it.

My yogurt is good.

We’re on the brink of a nuclear holocaust.

It’s not as easy to make a nuclear weapon as you think.

Huffington Post quiz on Scooter Libby.

.mac is stupid.

I’m still feeling off-kilter.

There’s another human rights violator aside from Darfur and that’s China.

Trotsky gets fussy.

Apple censors the word vagina in my podcast posts. Apparently vagina is a dirty word.

Josh Wolf is coming up on his 200th day of prison.

Reporters Without Borders are strange.

If you’re still on Second Life, please delete your account or I’ll hate you.

Nancy Pelosi is a great gal.

I watched Imitation of Life and it was creepy.

Gay Expat.

Music.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download (Duration: 1:30:00 — 42.3MB)

Podshow Plus Beta: Better. Faster. Stronger.

Podcasting that is so killer, it eats your mom out!

Visit GoDaddy.com– be creative and buy lots of domain names!
Use my codes to save:
Madge1 to save 10%
Madge2 to save $5 on a $30 or more purchase
Madge3 to get a $6.95 domain name (dotcoms only)

Shownotes by Matt Blender.

Sometimes I don’t wear my brassiere and I let my tits hang out.

I got a flyer with my anti-depressants that say my meds might make me kill myself.

Remember when Joan Rivers made fun of her husband before he killed himself?

I’m getting really good at eating yogurt.

My dirty dishes look like Cheryl‘s vagina.

tvh

I think anti-depressants can lead to suicide because they first make you aware of your depression.

Ryan Hanson from Podtech sent me a gorgeous San Fransisco tie-died t shirt.

Matt Blender.

Amy Abdu also sent me a present.

Reliving meat sodomy from my past.

I make fun of my own religion.

I had dinner with David Cerda and Bill Hadad. David lent me some camp movies.

David has restless leg syndrome, cyatica (?), and acid reflux. Cyatica’s great because you get to complain about it all the time.

Four reasons to get Sirius: Richard Simmons, Howard Stern, Playboy Channel, and me.

I’ve started eating Greek yogurt called fagola.

Cheryl is a definite maybe for Podcamp in New York.

How to make yogurt.

Trader Joe’s sells pomegranate, thank god.

I love blueberries.

I need a pro-active agent who gets me.

How the fuck can you be named Scooter? He’s a Yale weirdo.

Voicemail from Nurse Wonky.

Voicemail from the General Ledger.

Voicemail from a woman with a scary squeaky voice.

Why is it that I always have jobs where I’m paid to be stupid?

A voicemail where someone almost mentions some confidential things.

Weight Watchers meetings.

I play a clip from Millie’s Yiddish Class.

The only people who care about North Side vs. South Side in Chicago are the South Siders.

The New York Times is a piece of shit.

My favorite tech website: Virgin Trekker (?- Ed.)

Looking at Democracy Now.

The Bush administration is firing US Attorneys, which damages the judiciary branch.

Go see Outfoxed.

Cockburn.

A US army soldier refused to fight in the war and now he’s under arrest.

Our retarded policty with Iran’s uranium enrichment.

People complain about the government but then don’t keep informed on what’s going on.

George W’s first cousin Billy Bush is an entertainment reporter.

Educate yourselves.

Bicycle Mark‘s been doing a really great job on Eclectic News Brief.

I’m thinking about streamlining Eclectic News Brief.

My reaction to Bush’s statement about our “progress” in Iraq.

You pussy reporters need to get a backbone.

The US isn’t going to seek a seat on the UN human rights counsel.

The ACLU is filing a suit against the US on teh behalf of immigrant children detained in Texas.

You shouldn’t privatize institutions that can take away our freedoms, like prisons and the military.

I find absolutely no creditability in people who always take the party line, whether democrat, republican or whatever.

How can someone actually defend Clinton’s horrible record on gay rights?

What Halitosis failed to mention is that his biggest anti-gay act was also an anti human act and is the reason I did not vote for him to have a second term: He fired Surgeon General Jocyln Elders. Clinton wilted to fundamentalists lobbying to fire her because she wanted to give out condoms in school to prevent AIDS. Think of the lives that could have saved if we actually educated our kids about AIDS in a reasonable way.

Atrocious writes:

“So any gay Republican who has a problem that we haven’t had any great gay rights successes at the federal level in 12 years need go only in search of the nearest mirror in order to find who’s to blame. “

The way that he ASSuMEs that anyone who agrees with the above statement proves that he is seeing it all in black and white. Typical of people who are stuck in the NYtimes, lib-blogger echo chamber.

I didn’t read a peep from Mentholyptis when that uterus democrat Feinstein and Biden tried to make net broadcasts/podcasts subject to pay protection money to the RIAA. You’d think he would stand up for fellow citizen journalists. Nope. Can’t say anything bad about a Democrat.

I’m sorry but this way of thinking is very 90’s and very retarded. Government and politics are about principles, despite the constant repetition by pretty much everyone in this country that “all politicians are corrupt.” That’s bullshit.

People who have principles stick up for principles, not people.

Clinton did some good things and some bad things. I happen to think that the bad outweigh the good. And I am a far left democrat.

Oh, and by the way, Mr. Expialidocious, We gay people do not bear the burden of having to prove why we should have the exact same rights as straight people have in the consitution. Yes, we have to fight for it, but nobody and I mean nobody has the right to blame gays, no matter which of the broad spectrum of political parties (not really) he/she chooses.

Not even you are to blame, Mr. Precocious.

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Shownotes by Matt Blender.

This show is dedicated to those of you not dead yet. I hate you.

Mr. Zeeche song: “In This World.”

Thank goodness for those of you who can think and express what you think too.

A friend helped me realize that I pay too much attention to my audience.

I should talk to my audience online but I should not have them on my show. They’re boring.

Cheryl‘s a stupid bitch. If she doesn’t come to Podcamp with me and Wanda Wisdom I won’t speak to her again.

What people think of me is none of my business.

Yesterday I saw an old friend.

Sarah Silverman isn’t funny and she’s a bad actress.

I shouldn’t be badmouthing Podshow. I should be saying bad things about Cheryl, who tries to screw over my relationship with Podshow.

Matt Blender.

This show is going to be posted on Podshow Plus Beta first. Get over it.

Do you really want a daycare center owner that diddles your kids?

I know my silent majority of intelligent listeners is out there.

People who copy my catchphrases are idiots.

Don’t come on my show and badmouth my employees.

I sing: you either got it, or you ain’t.

Some people are too sensitive. But I love you and I have to tell the truth.

Look at all this shit I’ve held back because I’m depressed.

It’s always when I’m the most real when I get the most phonecalls.

Feel free to think whatever you want, then you’re stupid.

If you’re offended by what I do with my show then you’re stupid and you don’t get it.

I’m materialistic. I admit it.

Calli Lewis used me. I don’t like being used.

Old audio.

Music.

Essay about lymphoma.

Mr. Zeeche song: “I don’t want to die, man.”

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Shownotes by Matt Blender.

I try to call Andy Melton but the fucking asshole won’t answer.

Voicemail about my movies from Gay Trucker (?)

I’m so bored with myself.

I play another voicemail from some guy in San Diego who can’t speak up.

Andy’s lost another half an inch. His diet’s working.

Voicemail from Sharon in Tampon. She reads poems about my vagina and Wanda Wisdom.

Andy’s never had Ben and Jerry’s ice cream.

Andy does his Cheryl impersonation.

Trannywreck.

I play a New-Wavish Divine song.

I can’t believe they have John Travolta playing Divine’s part on Broadway.

Voicemail from Gay Trucker. She complains about my levels.

Gay Trucker’s with Podshow Plus Beta now.

Simon Tune sent me a voicemail and a taping of the Queen’s address.

Andy’s still in the closet w/his family.

I call Cheryl.

Cheryl complains about my levels or something and then compliments Andy on his weightloss.

Andy’s 100% body fat.

I told my psychiatrist that I’m overmedicated.

My birthday’s March 30th.

Cheryl tries to hang up on me.

Cheryl prank called a daycare center.

Cheryl tries to rush me.

People don’t give a shit whether or not I update.

A retarded guy won a contest for American Idol.

Steve Harris is going to a Mac Developer’s conference.

Cheryl tries to rush me again.

I try to get Andy and Cheryl to talk about stuff.

Cheryl’s lovelife sucks.

Al Sharpton’s related to Strom Thurmond.

My Skype call-in number is 773-831-4562.

I like food too much to kill myself. You don’t get to eat when you’re dead.

Andy still can’t get a scale that can weigh him.

I want to call Trannywreck but it’s too early for her.

I try to call John Ong but he’s “busy.” He’s an asshole.

Rob doesn’t answer my calls either. He’s an asshole too.

Andy reads me some gay Craigslist ads.

Cheryl comes back on. She pees out of her clit.

Everybody masturbates on Saturday mornings.

Sharon emailed Wanda Wisdom and told her to stop talking about her diet and they got into a cybercatfight.

Bill Streeter comes on.

I came up with a new diet plan.

I call up Grizelda.

Andy tells Grizelda his good news and Shishaldin’s mean about it.

Bill recommends the Amish Diet and Cheryl recommends the Smoking Diet.

Stacy from Karmabanque comes on.

Stacy thinks Cheryl looks hot in her bikini.

Max is on the line too.

Max says the rest of the world is dumping American dollars and America’s only making it worse.

Max says that gold is still a good investment.

Stacy says to invest in the yen or the Euro.

China recently beat out Japan as the US’s biggest debtor.

For the first time the American economy can collapse and the rest of the world will be fine.

I got a credit card in the mail to renew a card I never ordered.

Max says creditors abuse predatory lending tactics.

The academy awards.

Florida will cease to exist.

The government will step in to regulate the market even though it’s supposedly a free one.

Surveillance cameras.

Blue police surveillance cameras in certain Chicago neighborhoods.

People don’t understand principles anymore.

The Chicago mayoral election.

goldmoney.com

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Shownotes by Matt Blender.

I’m driving around listening to a Cheryl impersonator on the radio.

I talked about my medication with my psychiatrist.

Check out David Cerda on Insane Films.

Mayor Daley won the election. It was another scandal, as usual.

I bought a new frying pan.

I’m a lesbian so I did some home improvements.

Ikea is an amazing place with the Chinese slaves making the shit.

Driving by an adult toy store.

Did you know most people are dead?

David Cerda’s Hand Bag Productions.

DAVID CERDA HAS RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME AND ACID REFLUX.

My middle name: REVEALED!

I bought Trotsky a big Snoopy sex doll.

Wicked was so good. I’m going to see The Color Purple soon, too.

The Windy City Times is the biggest newspaper in the midwest.

I went clothes shopping but I didn’t like it because I’m a lesbian.

David Cerda wore purple like a lesbian would.

Andy Melton.

I don’t know what’s going on with the Sirius/XM merger but I think it would be a good thing.

I’m going to Podcamp and I’m going to see Wanda Wisdom and Mikeypod and Grizelda.

Who the fuck cares about Britney Spears?

Chicago: Lower Wacker and Upper Wacker.

Dave Calderbank sent me a phone sexxx mix.

I watched the Twilight Zone.

From Freedom to Fascism: the guy creates a pretty decent argument if you’re a moron.

PBS Frontline with Josh Wolf.

Chicago’s skyline is beautiful but the individual buildings are ugly.

The Sears Tower building is ugly, like Cheryl.

Everybody’s wasting electricity everywhere.

Junkmail’s a waste, too.

My psychiatrist said people only use 16% of their brains.

David Cerda said my show’s weird.

Sometimes I wonder if things work because we think they do.

Cabdrivers pee in cups. That’s why they smell like urine.

Soon I’ll be thin enough to go to the gym again.

A guy at my Weight Watchers meeting lost 100 pounds.

Wanda Wisdom is getting all skinny and now she has loose skin.

Singing a song about Andy Melton.

Everyone’s going to be thin now but me.

Berbacia: I need you to make a password for me on your website.

Have you ever associated a memory with a fart?